Thinking Logically
by YelyahFran
Summary: Simmons talks to Skye after the events in 1x05. She says things that Skye never thought she'd hear a girl like her say. Skyeward and slight Fitzsimmons
1. Chapter 1

**I planned on making this a rather long oneshot, but I really wanted to post it as soon as possible so I'm just going to post this now. I hope you guys like it because I (sort of) do and if so, I will be posting the next part of this twoshot by tomorrow. I think Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. is a pretty good show and I couldn't help but write this after seeing episode five. So I'm saying I'm doing this out of both inspiration and desperation.**

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**Disclaimer: I don't own Marvel or Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. which, I believe, is quite obvious.**

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It felt silly quite silly that she was being that stupid main character in the fanfictions she loathed. She'd done stupid things and she was going to cry about them just like any other girl. She'd been reduced to a mere sob story and the very thought of it made her want to vomit.

She toyed with the silver bangle on her wrist and thought of her stupidity. She'd went to Miles to warn him and slept with him instead, she betrayed the last people on earth that she'd ever wanted to betray and lastly, she'd let everyone, including herself, down just as she had expected.

The half hour that she spent alone in her freezing bunk seemed like ages. She would have gone out to turn up the heat were it not for the fear of meeting either May or Ward. Something was telling her that she would be encountering cold looks of loathing if she stepped one foot out.

Each failure seemed to be such a big deal; hell, she felt like a failure at life at that point. But something about joining the team, not S.H.I.E.L.D. itself, made her feel as if she wasn't as big a failure as she initially presumed.

They almost made her feel at home.

She thought about Ward and how they'd played Battleship, a rhythmic banter going back and forth between them. Something was telling her that she'd given that up without knowing it. It was a boulder in an avalanche that made her bury her head in a spot between her knees and her chest.

Buried in the deepest crevices of her heart that she dared not show to anyone was the longing to belong. She wanted the comfort of a family, a place where she felt like people would accept her. They'd done that and she hadn't appreciated it. So she ruined it instead.

She heard the soft, almost tentative and shy, knock on the door and if it were not for the size of her bunk, she would have missed it amidst all her sniveling and sobbing. She could not help but try to put on a brave face and wiped away any traces of tears that she could before sliding the door open.

Standing there was Simmons, smiling rather awkwardly at her as she held a box of tissues and a pint of cookie dough ice cream; definitely one of the last people she expected to knock on her door. She tried her best to smile back at the scientist, but failed miserably, making it look more like a grimace.

"I could hear you crying while I was on my way to my bunk," The girl said before tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. "So I brought you ice cream and tissues. I know you're not going through the standard break-up but the combination seems to cheer up the majority of the female population."

She wasn't exactly repulsed by the idea of someone voluntarily speaking to her. In fact, she found it the closest thing to miraculous and it was a welcomed idea all in all. She couldn't help the laugh that escaped her lips despite the circumstances of Simmons' visit.

She took her seat on the bed and made space for her to sit at the foot of it. "This is really cool of you and all, but you don't have to sit here and listen to me when you and Fitz could be doing who-knows-what in the lab."

Simmons shrugged before handing the girl the ice cream. "You need me more than he does." She replied. "Which is saying a lot really, considering the fact that I'm the one who reminds him to breathe in the middle of experiments."

She didn't say anything back and instead, leaned her head against the wall beside her. She could feel her guilt coming back full force as her skin met with the cool surface. "Why don't you hate me like everyone else does?" She questioned almost absent mindedly while staring into nothingness.

"Fitz doesn't hate you." Is all she can say before giving the answer some more thought. She searched her head for answers the way that she searched her head for possible solutions to problems. "He's doubtful of you and so am I, but we've gotten to know you and seen what you can do."

Skye sighed frustratedly before stabbing her spoon into the ice cream. "That's not good enough," She said and scooped like girls in the angry phase of their break-ups. "I want a real reason why you and/or Fitz don't hate me just as much as everyone else does."

Simmons collected herself for a moment as Skye sat across her, eating her ice cream almost angrily. Sometimes, she'd cry a bit and find need to use the tissues. Seeing the girl in that state gave her not only the time to think, but the answer to the question.

"I don't hate you because I think you're stupid, but I'd have done the same."

Her spoon was halfway to her mouth when she'd said what she had. She slowly put it back in the ice cream, mulling the answer over in her head. "That doesn't make any sense," She said, a look of absolute bewilderment on her face. "You're Simmons! Everything you do is a smart move in connection with logic itself."

"Maybe," The girl shrugged. "But I'm still human. I don't just make mistakes when I salvage tech or make formulas. Even the most logical people are weak when it comes to letting their heart rule their head. It's everybody's weakness. If it were someone I loved-"

"Fitz?" Skye could not help but sneak in the question that had remained unspoken for so long and Simmons blushed at the very thought.

"Most likely Fitz, yes," She as she felt the blood continue to rise up to her cheeks. "I would warn him and protect him to because he's a bloody idiot who can't take care of himself. And also, I don't think I could ever live with myself knowing that I might have been able to help him."

So it was all just the logic of the heart. The mind doesn't matter when making such decisions. In such circumstances, you can't help but ignore your brain, even when an alarm is going off in there. It's fighting a battle that just can't be won.

The insights of the bio-chemist made her slightly excited about the future. She feared the wrath of her companions, yes, but she was excited that there would come a time when she could try using the logic of the heart against the heart itself.

"Why don't you go talk to Ward?" Simmons said and the other girl laughed before stuffing more ice cream in her mouth. "I know that you think he hates you and he might, but telling him you're sorry helps. Besides, if you don't say it now then you're just going to live in that fear."

"I'd rather live in fear, thanks." Skye replied but her pint of ice cream was forcefully taken out of her hands before she could think about it. "It's not that easy just going up to a robot and telling him you're ready for your own death sentence."

The room was quiet for a moment and the scientist & the hacker stared each other down until Simmons finally won the battle. "You just need to stay strong and admit that you did something wrong." She advised before getting up.

"I'll keep that in mind." Skye said.

"And Simmons," She called before the other girl could get out of her bunk. "Thank you for talking to me. And also, I think you should tell Fitz before whatever this is gets blown out of control."

"Tell me what?" Fitz said from behind his partner. Simmons eyes widened considerably and she sent Skye a look that said that she'd lost one of the last two people on the plane that had reason to hate her, but did not.

She got up from her bed before pushing the two scientists out of her room. "You're welcome." She said with a small curtsy before sliding her door shut.


	2. Chapter 2

**Did I say tomorrow? Well, yeah, it is tomorrow over here. I posted at exactly 11:29 and it's 1:40 over here so it's basically tomorrow. Someone suggested that I write Simmons telling Fitz so I'm going to make this a threeshot and make the last part all nice and happy because this one makes me feel good but depressed at the same time. This one's actually really good, but it's just not happy. Alright, ignore my rambling and read.**

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**Disclaimer: I don't own Marvel or Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Unless you'd love to sell me the rights of course.**

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"Need company?"

No reply.

"Come on Ward, can you just please say something?"

No reply.

"Anything?"

Still no reply.

The last word sounded so meek and soft to her own ears. He still sat in the same spot where she'd left him, nursing what must have been his fourth glass of scotch. Agent May had left, much too smart to let herself get intoxicated when she was in charge of flying a plane. Plus solitude was more important to her.

She swallowed and thought about how it was better that he get angry than he not talk to her at all. She wanted to hear him say something to her, to not be that cold block of ice that she loathed. His anger, in a strange way, was a sort of affection that she craved.

"I know that you can't stand to look at me,"

She thought of how he didn't even turn around when she'd asked him if he would speak to Coulson with her. She felt hurt and betrayed and she imagined that what her S.O. felt were here feelings multiplied by a thousand; irreparable damage, if you asked her.

"And that you don't even want to talk to me ever again,"

He wouldn't say a single word to her and that was what made her skin crawl. She liked Ward when he tried to block or counter any of her smart remarks and retorts. It was like a game of Battleship that she'd not only lost, but gave up on the moment she'd warned Miles.

"But I guess you're still my S.O.,"

His glass touched his lips and she almost felt like sobbing again before finishing what she had to say to him. A determination to finish her one-sided conversation flared inside her as if he'd handed her a shot of vodka that made its way into the pit of her stomach. She just had to say what she needed to say.

"And I want you to know that I'm deeply and unbelievably sorry."

He drained the entire glass before turning the chair to look at her. He wasn't surprised by the disheveled hair and the slightly bloodshot eyes, but he was shocked at his own concern upon seeing her shiver. It was like a trap, a mechanism that he'd triggered that made him feel something beyond responsibility for her.

"I know that you're sorry, but I'm not sure that I care."

The words were said with such finality that her breath hitched in her throat for a moment before something in her snapped. She felt as if he didn't understand her motives and her intentions no matter how hard she tried. There was just no winning with Agent Grant Ward.

"WHAT THE HELL WAS I SUPPOSED TO DO?!"

Her yelling was enough to wake up the entire plane, but no one came down to check on them after a minute. He figured that they were smart enough not to intervene in such business. All the same, his blank expression did not change and it exasperated her.

"Do you honestly think I wanted anybody to hate me? All I wanted to do was help Miles and I get that that was wrong, but you can't blame me for it."

She saw him turn red at her choice of words and half of her expected that he would finally start yelling back at him. The other half of her expected him to shoot her or hurt her or just about anything that would cause her physical pain. It was a lot better than what he was doing.

"Don't turn this around on me or on anyone else. You got on this plane and you hurt everyone."

And in that moment, she knew she'd lost him and every ounce of respect that she'd earned from him. She deserved his hate and his coldness and the blame that he was putting right in front of her. She made him sick and that hurt her most of all.

She racked her brain for things to say to him before she went to bed. Tomorrow would be another day and she was unsure if things would be better or worse between the two of them. She was hoping for the former, however unlikely it seemed to be.

"You're disgusted because I slept with Miles and you're hurt because I betrayed everyone on this plane. I understand and take full responsibility for all of that. But it still seems like you're blaming me for something that I'm not aware of."

"I fucking trusted you." She looked down at her feet at the sound of him swearing. "I helped you and I defended you. I tried to be a good S.O. because I actually thought that I could make you better. Never in my life have I wished this much to have been right."

He tore her upart, piece by piece, bit by bit, until only her heart and her mind were left. She tried to think of Simmons and what she had said about thinking logically, but he'd destroyed her. There was no heart and mind left to use for thinking logically.

"The point still stands, Ward. I came here to say I'm sorry."

"Prove it." He didn't think when he said it, it kind of just slipped out. He thought of the scotch and blamed it on that before getting up to walk away and get ready for bed. But something about the whole scene told him that walking away wouldn't be so easy.

Every step he took towards the doorway was a heavy struggle for both of them. He wanted her to say something just so they couldn't leave it on such a bitter note and she wanted to find something to do so that she could grant his wish.

And before she knew it, she'd grabbed his wrist and pulled him down. Her lips met his and it just felt different, but not in the cliché way that most of you are probably thinking. She thought of how he was different from Miles and how he made her feel like there was still some good left in the world. And maybe he was part of that good.

He pulled away from her far too quickly for either of their liking, but he knew such territory was toxic. He leaned her forehead against hers, eyes closed and breathing heavy as if they'd engaged in a rigorous workout.

"Consider that a promise," She told him in a voice no louder than a whisper. "That I'm going to be better and I'm going to pay you what I owe because you're never going to understand how thankful I actually am to you."

And like a ghost, she drifted away from him, with the feeling of her lips on his nothing but a promise that she intended to keep.


	3. Chapter 3

**Okay, here is the Fitzsimmons chapter! I absolutely love Fitzsimmons, even more than Skyeward (I'M SORRY OKAY) because something about their interactions are so innocent and wonderful. Plus the fact that they're absolutely adorable. I hope you guys enjoyed this threeshot and I'm going to start a series of oneshots for Fitzsimmons later today so please check that out!**

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**Disclaimer: I don't own Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. or Marvel. If I did, I would know why the promo looked like that but I don't. Also, please do not discuss that promo with me unless you want me to shatter.**

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There were things that she could see coming before they even happened. She knew what was going to come next, she knew the sequence like the back of her hand just because everything and everyone has a certain predictability. She wasn't psychic, she was just plain brilliant.

Out of everyone on the entire plane, she figured that she'd always been the most predictable. She always wore those blouses and sweater that went well with her cheerful personality, she always had the same corn flakes for breakfast and she always remained beside her partner as much as she possibly could.

So all in all, her mind figured out that developing romantic feelings for him were not completely out of the question. She tried to make sense of the feelings, no matter how impossible it was. It was only when Skye had shoved her out of her bunk that she realized that she'd been thinking the wrong way.

All that time, she thought with her mind, trying to figure everything out; when in reality, her best bet was to start thinking with her heart. She was an expert on many things and had two PhDs, but such matters were things she was wholly oblivious to.

"Simmons, what's going on? What's she talking about?" He asked but she couldn't focus on his words. She tried to search her mind for any excuse, anything that would shake him off of her trail. Something about the idea of telling the person you like that you like them is just gruesomely scary.

Before her mind even processed her actions, she was already walking away with the heels of her comfortable suede boots making a sound that echoed throughout the corridor. She could hear him calling after her, asking questions as he continued to follow her, but she focused on trying to get away.

"Oh come on Simmons, the girl already told you to tell me!" He rambled on as they neared the spiraling staircase down to the lab. Both had thrown out the idea of sleep, much too awake with the thought of the other on their minds. "I'm not going to leave you alone until you tell me."

"It was nothing, Fitz," She said without even turning to glance at him as he trailed behind her like lace. "You just happened to come by when she was telling me to convince you that she's not the bad person that everyone makes her out to be."

She'd always been a terrible liar, always stopping at the wrong points in the sentence when she made it up as she went along. He knew this and continued to follow her despite the irritable look on his best mate's face.

"You're lying to me, Jemma."

She was already halfway down the staircase when he'd said this and she almost stumbled forward at his words. He quickly steadied her so that she wouldn't fall down and she felt her breath hitch in her throat at the feeling of his hands on her waist.

She turned to face him with an astonished look upon her pretty face. "You're accusing me of lying?" She all but yelled at him, even if he was right. She just couldn't bring herself to tell him anything. "I'm completely baffled by your accusation."

"Stop it!" He yelled back and she shrunk away slightly, seeing a look in his eyes that wasn't quite anger but more frustration than anything. "I'm your best mate Simmons and I am not going to stand for you not telling me something that I am obviously a part of!"

She scoffed before continuing to make her way down the steps. The plane suddenly seemed colder and she felt as if the whole world was about to crash around her. Something about the whole situation said that if she didn't tell him, he was going to make it a bigger ruckus that they wouldn't be able to resolve.

"What the hell are you so afraid of that you can't tell me, Jemma?" He asked her and she was taken aback by this. Her fingers were just about to enter the code that opened the lab doors, but she withdrew. "You're so afraid of telling me that you're making us fight."

"Have you always been this accusing?"

"Have you always been this infuriating?"

"Well, pardon me if I find bloody idiots like you attractive!"

She never meant to say it; her heart made an impulsive decision that travelled to her mouth in less than a nanosecond. They both stood there, shocked by her own confession, with their jaws hanging open and their brilliant minds filled with words that they couldn't say.

"Y-you find me attractive?" He said in a voice that was barely even a squeak. She looked like a fish out of water by the way she her mouth opened and closed when she tried to find something to say. He walked forward to touch her. "Jemma, I-"

Both the cargo hold and the laboratory suddenly went black. He caught a glimpse of Simmons punching in the numbers to the power before they went off. He heard the lab doors open and slipped inside. He memorized the lab by heart, but he had no idea where she'd hidden herself. She was small enough to hide in the crevices.

He suddenly heard the sound of her crying, a sound that made him feel like joining her. They'd always followed along, mimicking each other's actions without even realizing it. But he guessed that it also went the same way with emotions sometimes.

He encoded for the lights to turn back on and dimmed them so that they were soft and pleasing to the eye. He spotted her with her face buried in her hands in a space between the supply closet and one of the tables. The space was big enough for both of them to fit in, so he figured that he should join her.

They both welcomed the heat radiating from each other's bodies. They were in close enough proximity that their knees bumped each other as she continued to cry, but being there beside him gave her some unexpected comfort.

He tried to put his arm around her, but he'd always been so amazingly awkward that he just couldn't manage it. Instead, he settled for patting and rubbing her back, drawing lazy circles on it the way he knew she liked him to draw on her hand when the field got worse.

"I'm sorry Fitz."

"What are you sorry for?" The puzzled look on his face was rewarded by her finally getting her face out of her hands to look at him. He wiped the tears and their trails from her face with his thumb and she closed her eyes.

"I'm sorry I fell for you, I never meant to. I know that I'm your best mate and I'm nothing perfect, but you're just such a bloody idiot that I couldn't help myself. I can memorize a hundred page book in an hour but I couldn't-"

He never got to find out what she couldn't do. He held her tighter in his arms, tighter than he ever had in his entire life. Even after times when they'd almost gotten killed, he had never held her tighter and closer to him than he did then.

"You don't have to be sorry." He whispered in her ear and she found that the sound of his Scottish lilt was more comforting to her than ice cream and tissues. "Nobody chooses who they fall for and I sure as hell didn't mean to fall for you either."

His words made her smile, the genuine one that she'd made whenever she made a new discovery. "You know what I said? About you being a bloody idiot?" She asked and he felt her nod with his head still on her shoulder. "Well, I'm just like you."

He pulled away from her and looked at her face. In the dim light, her brown eyes shone with excitement at the events that just occurred and the tears were nothing but a memory. He tucked a strand of her hair behind her ear impulsively and stroked his thumb at the edge of her mouth.

His kiss was both chaste and passionate. He did not ask for much from her, but he only asked that she assure him that she felt the same way about him. She returned the sigh of affection, breathing out a small sigh of happiness.

"You're still infuriating." He said and she leaned her head against his shoulder.

Maybe their day wasn't so bad after all.


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